99 Days....and Counting

We have 99 Days until Thanksgiving.  Well, more like 98 since it's the end of this day.  Which means...wait for it..I only have 98 days to lose 30 pounds.  Okay, it's not so terribly dramatic.  It's not like if I don't lose 30 pounds in the next 98 days that I'll explode or something.  But I have some extra incentive to lose the weight this time.  My favorite sister-in-law just had a baby and now she's ready to lose the baby weight and she wants us to be accountable to each other.  I can do it for her, right?  If we break it down, that's 10 pounds a month.  Break it down further, that's 2.5 pounds a weeks.  That's a calorie deficit of approximately 1,250 calories a day.  Okay...not exactly sure what the science breaks down to, but I'm thinkin' 1300 calorie diet and 45-60 minutes of good cardio six days/week.  

It's time to get started.

The Candy Bar: Chubby Mac vs. the M&Ms

In our office, we have what we call "The Candy Bar."  It's a table that sits in our foyer with several apothecary jars full of yummy candy goodness.  What's your pleasure?  M&M's?  We have two and sometimes three different varieties.  Snickers?  Reese cups?  Jolly Ranchers?  Starburst?  We got it at the bar.  When visitors come in, we encourage them to fill a small paper cup with a candy cocktail.  And of course, employees have the freedom to eat all the candy our teeth can handle throughout the work day.  Talk about a sweet office perk!

While it may be good for morale, it's not so good for my diet.  There have been many days when I've fought the temptation to get up and fill my little paper cup (it's not that much, right?) full of M&Ms.  Just a little chocolate with my coffee.  And I admit, more often than not, I've given in to that temptation.  In fact, I was giving in every day.  I kept thinking it wouldn't hurt, but those little bits of candy started to add up.  I would tell myself that I was going to stop eating the candy, but somehow I kept going back.  And so, I started a score card at the beginning of this week.  For every day that I don't eat M&Ms, I get a point.  As of today, it's Chubby Mac: 3, M&Ms: 1.  And I'm really proud of that.

Rating Scale

I'll admit, not looking at the scale has been really hard for me.  The scale and I have been one-sided enemies in a dependent, almost psychologically damaging relationship for years.  I hate it.  Yet, I need it.  It tells me if I am good or if I am bad.  It wields unwitting power over me and determines my mood in the morning.  What kind of day will it be?  Like a fortune teller laying out the cards, I hold my breath as the numbers roll.  I feel like a gambler, luck be a lady, betting it all on a hot pair of dice.  And if I don't have the scale to tell me, I have to spend the whole day blindly determining whether or not I'm on the right path or the wrong path.

If that sounds intense, it's because it is for me.  And I'm thinking I'm not the only woman who has faced that scale since Jr. High and let it determine who I was, what I was worth, how I should be treated and how I should treat myself.  I wish I could say that it's no longer a chain about my ankles.  But I fear, just as Scrooge's Marley, I will be doomed to carry it around my entire adult life, always aware of it, never leaving it behind.   I remind myself that my value is in my character, my talents, my accomplishments, not my dress size.  It sounds noble, but this single girl, this chubby mac, has never been able to believe those noble words.


I attended a tele-seminar about being a positive person yesterday.  It's such a good message, such a God message.  I want to be more positive.  And I believe that part of that means not allowing the scale, and my negative self-image to define me.  I believe it, but I'm not sure how to practice it.  


Anyone else struggling with this?  How do you measure your worth?  What are steps you're taking to be a positive person?

Count Down

Calorie counting.  It works.  I know it works because whenever I want to go on a diet, I always try other methods but end up counting calories.  And it always works.  This time I'm trying to stay under 1300 calories, closer to 1200.  I've done a menu and calorie count for the week.  You can view my diet chart here.  And I'm taking every Saturday as a cheat day.  You can view the logic behind cheat days here.  I will be weighing in once a week, on Saturday mornings.

Here's a picture of what I had for dinner tonight....so delicious.

A Fresh Start

Okay, I admit that I failed.  I just couldn't do the low-carb thing.  I couldn't stand the limited options and my body was seriously craving sugar.  After I got sick from running w/o any carbs in my system, I knew I couldn't do it.  So, never one to stay down for long, I am going to stick w/ my plan to lose 30 pounds...only I want to do it in a more gradual and realistic way.

I'm going to give myself 12 weeks instead of six.  This puts me at losing 2-3 pounds per week.  That's a lot more realistic, no?  And I'm going to aim for running 21 miles per week.  That will include two rest days so I don't injure myself again.  21 miles is easily doable for me.

Source

I'm going to lean heavily on fruits and vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains while counting calories.  All of this sounds down right sensible and less like a gimmick.  And my cuz is going to diet and excercise along with me for accountability.

I will be posting my weight every Saturday along with my picture.  Wish me luck...or better yet, pray for me.  Thanks everyone!

Day Twenty-Three

Okay Friends, I'm just going to say it.  I'm discouraged.  So discouraged, in fact, that I couldn't even blog about it yesterday.  Maybe I need a new approach to this whole dieting thing.  Clearly what I'm doing is not working.

I have an injury that's going to prevent me from running this week.  I should have listened to my body, and my previous store of knowledge, and rested on Sunday after those 8 miles on Saturday.  But I didn't.  So, Monday's run ended after about a mile and a half of running on a very sore right shin.  Mary, you warned me, but I refused to heed your warning.  I know better.  This is not my first run around the block.  But with an injured leg, a scale that keeps creeping up, and a diet that's less than palatable, I'm discouraged indeed.

Knowing that there's no possibility of losing anywhere near 30 pounds in 42 days, I've changed the subtitle of my blog.  It's time to get real.  Encouraging words are much needed and appreciated.

Day Twenty-One

I love Sundays.  I love teaching Sunday School.  I love singing the worship songs.  I love the preaching, teaching, time with friends.  Today was an unusual Sunday.  After morning service, our worship and drama team performed a play.  I was in charge of telling the youth how to wait tables.  Being a professional, I took my job seriously.  We had a lot of fun, shared a lot of laughs.  And though I tried to discreetly get out of there without eating...the food looked so delicious, multiple people insisted that I sit down and have lunch.  Somehow, I dodged the well-intentioned and insistent pleas of my friends and was able to escape out the side door.  

Source

I went for my usual 3.5 mile run, came home and ate some chicken.  Part of me wishes I had sat down and ate with everyone else....  In the grand scheme of things, that would have probably been a better decision.  But I'm too self-conscious to eat in front of people anyway.  What's up with that?!?!?

Day Twenty-One 148lbs

I bought some delicious fruit, yogurt, and whole grains for this week.  I'm hoping to incorporate them into a healthy diet  I've got big plans of turkey sandwiches, vegetable soup, and Mulit-Grain Cheerios.
I really hope to see the scale budge this week.  I'd at least like to lose the 3 pounds I've already lost and gained back over the course of these 3 weeks.  With 28 pounds left to lose, I need to see some results.

Day Twenty

Eight miles.  I determined in my mind that I could run it.  And so, this afternoon, I did.  I suppose the hardest part of running is deciding in your head that you can do it.  I've found that the body will do whatever the mind tells it to.  It's the mind that needs convinced.  And so, on Friday, my mind was already made up, and today I ran the four miles to my church and home again.  
I couldn't believe how good it felt, how strong I felt, how satisfied I was when I finally finished.  Truth be told, it took me entirely too long to do it.  I run slow, and have terrible form.  But I run.  That's the important thing.

Day Twenty 148lbs

I'm sure you've all noticed the 2 pound flux in my weight.  But we won't worry about that because we know I carb-loaded in order to prepare for my run.  

Tonight I had the most delicious rotisserie chicken for dinner.  I also had corn, a potato, and a biscuit.  More carbs.  More running tomorrow.


Mary, there's my feet again.  Not sure what the appeal is, but I'm glad you like them. :)

Day Nineteen

I'm carb-loading tonight.  The workout I'm planning for tomorrow is going to cut significantly into my reserves, so in order not to be sick, I am carb-loading tonight.  Of course, you'll have to tune back in tomorrow night in order to know what that workout is.  Everyone in suspense yet?

Source

The best part of my day was when my boss, (remember the best. boss. ever. who bought me cocoa roasted almonds?) had a massage therapist come into the office because we all had a full and stressful week.  Seated chair massage to start a busy day?  Yes, please.  There were also brownies...and lots of laughter (as always), and a general mood of satisfied happiness.  Sigh.  I love my job and my co-workers.  How many people can say that honestly?

Day Nineteen 146lbs

The worst part of my day was when I had rushed to get home, changed into my gear, told Friend that I had to hurry or....that's right, the rain.  And even though, like Clint Black, I've walked in the rain, I knew that starting my run in a downpour was simply unwise.  So, as I was racing to get it together, Friend shouted the bad news at me from her post at the window...the rain had come and ruined my plan.

But, as Scarlett O'Hara once said, "After all, tomorrow is another day."  And tomorrow will be a great day to run, do laundry, go grocery shopping....and I'm ready for a nap already.

Day Eighteen

How do I describe today?  It was very very full.  And there was so much good in it....  I guess when I was "in the furnace of affliction", it's days like this that I missed the most.  I got a lot of work done, laughed A LOT with my co-workers, had a great run, and enjoyed wonderful dinner, fellowship, and Bible study with some of my besties.  

Day Eighteen 146lbs

I found out that the route I've been running is not three miles.  I measured it today.  It's actually three and a half miles!!  Mary, that brings my total miles in the past six days up to 17.5.   Woot!  Woot! I'm so proud of me!  Even though I'm still at 146, I feel strong.  I feel healthy.  I feel good about myself.  And that's a super accomplishment.

Day Seventeen

So, as expected, my weight shifted upward a pound.  I knew that would happen after I was so sick on Monday evening and ate some less-than-diet-friendly foods on Tuesday in an effort to satisfy my stomach.  

But today, I've been back on track.  I ate a chicken salad at Bob Evans.  Very good.  Actually I couldn't finish even half of it.  With that, I had a piece of bread- I know, that's a low-carb no-no.  But I knew I was going for a run today, which I did after work, so I had to have some carbs in me or get sick again.  That makes sense, right?

So many different things going on in my life right now.  It's not exactly fair to my body to punish it this way.  On the other hand, sometimes it's easier to change everything all at once to get it out of the way.

Friend's not home, so no picture tonight.  I would love to hear about everyone's weight loss journey.  Any good stories out there?

Day Sixteen

Sorry, Friends.  I was very ill yesterday and couldn't post.  But at least now I know why I was sick.  It turns out, that I can either go on a low-carb diet or run, but I can't do both.  My body will not allow for it.  

Day Sixteen 145lbs

Because I was feeling so sick, I had to break my diet today.  I had some sprite, some broth and some yogurt.  I couldn't stomach much else.  That is, until much later in the evening.  I confess, I had a slice of pizza...and a cookie.  It's like Hank Williams says, your cheatin' heart will tell on you.

Source

So, no exercise today.  I actually was jonesin' for a run but didn't have time to do that, the dishes, go to my grandma's, and do my taxes.  PS... I hate taxes.

Day Fourteen

The end of the day and I'm exhausted.  I went for another run today and I didn't know if I could finish, but I pushed through...not sure if I'm glad or not.  I hurt so bad I can barely walk.  Not looking forward to getting up and moving in the morning.

Source

Today I had some turkey and cheese for both lunch and dinner.  It was yummy.  I ate nearly the whole package.  I'm really wishing I'd bought more so I could take it to work.

Day Fourteen 148lbs

Finishing the night with another Columbo movie.  How does Peter Falk do it?  Friend gets disappointed in herself if she can't figure out the whole thing within the first 20 minutes.  It's hard for her to believe that she herself is not Columbo.  As good as she is at it, sometimes it's hard for me to believe too.

Hoping for a scale that budges in the morning.  Though hope is not a strategy, it's all I got.

Day Thirteen

Inspired by my friend Mary (Dear Sister Diaries), I decided to go for a run today.  Honestly, I haven't run too much in the past year since I completed the Indy Mini last May.  That was as much running as my puny body could handle.  But today, I got out my old shoes and gear and ran the three miles I usually walk.  It started raining when I was about a mile yet from home.  But what else could I do but keep running?  By the time I got home, I was completely drenched...but I felt good.  Really good.  Granted, I might not feel so good in the morning when my muscles are sore and I have to get up and teach Sunday School.

We went to Applebees for dinner.  They have delicious steak, and although I love the garlic mashed potatoes, I was good and just had two sides of veggies.  Bonus points for willpower.
  

Here is what dinner looked like.

After dinner, Friend decided that we needed a delicious treat.  So, we found this recipe and made low-carb peanut butter cookies.  

Day Thirteen 148lbs

Thus, beautifully rounding out the three C's of the evening.  Cookies, coffee, and Columbo. 


Since Friend is home, I got a pic for today.  Friend had my laughing about something, thus the cheesy grin.  It was a good day.

 

Day Twelve

Okay my friends, I need encouragement.  Lots of it.  This morning when I stepped on the scale, I had gained two pounds. Two pounds.  It was so discouraging.  And I'll admit, I've had cheatin' on my mind today.  I wanted pizza so bad.

This is what I wanted.

Source

I wanted it so bad, I was on the verge of calling my brother to split it with me.  Why must Pizza Hut make their dinner box so delicious and affordable?!?!  But it was Mom to the rescue.  She made me a little pizza on a rolled out crescent roll.  Probably a total of 15 carbs.  And although that's not hyper-low-carb, it was such a better alternative to ordering in.  Bonus points for my awesome mom.

   This is what my pizza looked like....and it was super yummy. 

I left Charles at home and went for a long walk this evening.  I hope it pays off on the scale tomorrow.  Friend is not home, so I do not have a picture to share tonight.  Thanks for cheering me on.  Tomorrow will be a better day!

Day Eleven

Cake pops.  That pretty much sums up my whole afternoon and evening.  I have been standing on my feet dipping cake pops for the last several hours and now I just want to collapse into my bed.  I think that will be the best part of my day, laying down and falling asleep.  Not that it's been a bad day.  It's been a pretty good day.  Just a full day.

Source

The nice thing about working in my own kitchen is that I got to watch several episodes of Little House.  So many shenanigans.  It's way at the top of my list of all-time-favorite-tv-shows.  

Day Eleven 146lbs

I didn't get to exercise tonight because of the cake pops.  I had dinner here with my Bible Study girls, cheesy chicken bacon ranch, broccoli and cheese, and deviled eggs.  I was completely full.

AshB's- The Cake Pop Shop

And here on the right is what I've been tempted by all week.....

Anyone else had to deal with temptation this week?

Day Ten

 Okay, I've added another row to my weight chart:  Starting weight.  As much as I want to forget that I was ever in the "150's", it's kind of exciting to see how far I've come.  Friend says I'm getting better at not making a weird "I'm scared" face when she's taking my picture too.  Bonus points!  So, I am making progress.

Source

Today at work, my boss asked if we needed anything since she was running to the drugstore.  We all shouted out random odd things, and I shouted out the only thing on my mind: cheese.  I was so hungry from only having Atkins bars for breakfast and lunch.  Turns out, the drugstore doesn't sell cheese, but it does sell cocoa roasted almonds.  And my boss, being the awesome person she is, brought me a whole canister.  AND a four-pack of tic-tacs!  (There are NO carbs in tic-tacs!)  Best.  Boss.  Ever.

Day Ten 147lbs

Charles and I took a long walk after work today.  It was still a little cool outside, but nothing we couldn't handle.  Youth Group from 6-7:30, 100 cake pops rolled, and a delicious hot ham and cheese complete a lovely evening.  And Pandora is nice enough to play a little John Mayer.  I feel good.


Any of you having a good day on your weight-loss plans?

Day Nine

 I've officially lost five pounds now.  Super pumped.  The best part about today was spending the evening with my friend at Starbucks.  We literally talked for hours, and would probably be talking still if I didn't have to get home to dip my cake pops.

I never did get a chance to exercise today.  It was a bit cold out, compared to how warm it's been this spring, and I didn't have the time anyway.  I hope that it won't affect the scale tomorrow.

Source

Day Nine 148lbs

Today I tried a Jimmy John's "unwich".  Basically, it's everything you would normally get on a sandwich, but instead, it's wrapped in a big piece of lettuce.  Really tasty.  I definitely see myself doing that a few more times over the next 33 days.

I never really did get around to eating dinner....

Day Eight

I have officially completed an entire week.  This is not the easiest thing I've ever done, I'll be honest.  But I have lost four pounds, and that makes it totally worth it.  Friend has lost six pounds!  Woot-woot!  Hands in the air for a victory dance.  
 
The best part about today was going on a long walk with Charles.  I don't usually take my mp3 player, but today I did and listened to some of my favorite songs that I didn't even realize were on there.  It was really hard not to sing along.

Day Eight 149lbs

I had a grilled chicken salad at lunch today.  It was awesome-delicious.  And so filling, I didn't even get hungry for dinner.  In fact, I wasn't even planning to eat until Friend came home, found me elbow deep in cake (for that 125 pop order this week), and said she was hungry.  That was nearly 9 o'clock.  So we had some ham and cheese and chocolate roasted almonds.  No complaints.

Day Seven

You know you're taking your low-carb diet seriously when you've just taken communion at church and you suddenly panic because you don't know how many net carbs are in the wafer and grape juice.  Yeah...kinda scared myself.

I took two nice, long walks today.  I'm determined to get out of the 150s.  I thought for sure I'd have lost another pound by now, but the scale is stuck at 150.0.  Just 0.1 pound would put me back in the 140s where I don't belong, but wouldn't mind passing through.  Sigh.

Source

Day Seven 150lbs

Tonight we are having a cookout at Mom and Dad's house.  Mom said she would make sure there was stuff I could eat.  I'm really hoping for steak.  Really really hoping.  Maybe some salad too.  I found out that regular Ranch dressing has fewer carbs than Light Ranch.  What kind of sick world is this?!?!

Regardless, here's my Day Seven picture.  Maybe, like Mary suggested yesterday, I am losing inches.  I'll take whatever I can get.